Baby's Got Book

Another, "I thought I was gonna die laughing" video for you. It's a spoof of the Sir Mix-A-Lot song, "Baby's Got Back"...

EXTRA EXTRA, Read all about it!

THIS JUST IN: REALTORS defy the laws of mathematics!

If you thought REALTORS were just ordinary members of our society, think again folks. The world is seeing the breakdown of the laws of mathematics right before their eyes. Archimedes, move over.... The REALtors are here!

If you pay careful attention, you may see the incredible happening before your eyes! Look closely at the facts and ponder this....

Over 9% of Realtors in the U.S. claim to be in the top 1% of Realtors nationwide in sales! Are you blinded by the brilliance of these Godlike creatures? Don't let the poor communication skills, horrible typing, inadequate marketing, absent negotiation skills, and horrendous time management of these individuals fool you... YOU ARE TRULY IN THE PRESENCE OF GREATNESS! Until recently, only Jesus of Nazareth has been able to make 9 from 1, and that was almost 2000 years ago!

Time is short. Don't wait... Call your local real estate office today. If the person who answers the phone informs you that they are a "Reel-a-tur"... you can die knowing you conversed with a member of the group that rewrote the laws of mathematics. Look out Newton... the Reelaturs are coming after you next.

Cameron

P.S. There are many expert REALTORS out there that are well worth any amount you pay them. Keep in mind that most of these experts don't have to tell you how great they are, because they're busy SHOWING you why you made a good decision to hire them.

Real Estate Commissions around the globe

If you ever wondered what real estate commissions are common in other parts of the world... wonder no more. Below is a chart of average real estate commissions paid around the globe. How bout those govenment taxes in Finland?

Discount Real Estate Brokers (like Help-U-Sell) & even worse

While hiring a discount real estate broker (such as Help-U-Sell) can be detrimental to your financial health, going it alone as a For Sale By Owner is typically worse. The numbers are in, the debate is sooo over! For sale by owners sell their homes for almost 18% less on average than comparable full service real estate brokers. Discount real estate brokerages don't fare much better.

Why should I list with a full service, full time, professional Realtor you ask?
I'll tell you!

In fact, I'll let you figure it out on your own...

Let me just pose a few questions to help you out...
Why do you think Michael Jordan uses a masterful business agent and pays TOP DOLLAR for the service rather than having someone else do the job for 1/2 the price? If you've just finished a big joint and you're a bit dazed, I'll be blunt(no pun intended).... He pays the professional because the pro can produce better results than if Michael had hired the agent who charged 1/2 the industry standard because he knew the outcome was riding on the agent he hired.

Let me try again, just in case you just polished off a 6 pack right before you smoked the weed.... If you needed a life saving surgical procedure, would you be looking through the mailbox for a Help-U-Operate flyer offering a discount if you help the doctor find your spleen? NO! You'd be saying... the outcome of this is paramount and I want to assure success by hiring the best!

Conversely.... If you were top notch surgeon, would you be out on the street corner offering up your surgical services out for $50 per procedure? Now you're beginning to get it.

Hey... I guess I shouldn't be so hard on the Do-it-yourselfers. You gotta give them credit for trying. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go operate on my right hand. I got it torn of while I was trying to cut out the middle man and make my own alligator shoes. Don't worry about the pain.... I've got my own pharmacy in the garage to make my own Codeine. I'm sure everything will be alright.... I mean... how hard could it be. I'm sure those pharmacists are way overpaid and a monkey could do the job just as well.

Just to be on the safe side... maybe you should call a full service real estate broker when the alcohol and the weed wears off.

P.S. Remember that guy from Brentwood... O.J. Simpson? Yes, the one that murdered his wife and her friend and got away with it. He hired F. Lee Bailey, Johnny Cochran, and a few other VERY EXPENSIVE attorneys after opting not to go with "Help-U-Defend". I Wonder why?

I thought I was gonna die laughing!

Spiders on drugs

Google Ad Spam???

I will attempt to complete this entry without uttering any obscenities regarding GOOGLE and their seemingly unethical ad delivery.

Why do I find GOOGLE serving it's own ads on my web pages? When one of my visitors clicks on an ad of theirs, I typically get 1 cent. I'm not the rocket scientist metaphysician clairvoyant mathmetician type, but it seems to me that someone OTHER than Google was probably willing to pay more than 2 cents each for those ad spaces. Did I mention that they served one of their ads in each of the 4 ad slots in the ad bank, or that each of those ads led to a destination page FULL of click ads!

You'd think a company as large as Google, making the kind of money they make... wouldn't have to to business in an unethical manner to stay on top.

I found this interesting article outlining some of Google's shortcomings with regard to operating their business in an fair/ethical manner: http://blog.centraldesktop.com/comments.php?y=06&m=12&entry=entry061206-010627

Unless I'm missing something.... Shame on you Google!

Make your favorite website GO CRAZY!

Very cool....
Load your favorite website with Internet Expolorer... then paste the following code in the address bar and press enter.... Ain't it cool?

javascript:R=0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI=document.images; DIL=DI.length; function A(){for(i=0; i-DIL; i++){DIS=DI[ i ].style; DIS.position='absolute'; DIS.left=Math.sin(R*x1+i*x2+x3)*x4+x5; DIS.top=Math.cos(R*y1+i*y2+y3)*y4+y5}R++}setInterval('A()',5); void(0);


Don't waste your time trying it on this blog... I already did and the result is boring. Yahoo.com Google.com work well.

More Ryland Rant

I was just told by a Ryland sales associate that Ryland will take contingent buyers as long as the buyer will list their home with RPM (their affiliated listing company).... BUT that they don't have to accept contingent buyers who would not list with RPM.

As a Realtor, I cannot force a client to use any certain services. I can only recommend service providers. Ryland is actually turning clients away that will not use their affiliated company for services.

THIS REEKS OF DISCRIMINATORY PRACTICES! In other words...ILLEGAL and UNETHICAL!

Ok, I'm fully vented.

Ryland Homes questionable sales practices

Picture this. You're a real estate agent. You stop into the new Ryland sales office in your city. You inquire as to if the builder is cooperating with brokers. The sales representative proudly tells you they're paying 3% if you register your clients on the first visit. She also gives you a flyer stating the same.

*two weeks go by*

You take a client over to the new home office, register your client, and proceed to show and sell your client on the homes, price of the homes, benefits of the homes, etc. Your client decides, based upon your advice, to purchase the MODEL. The price is $621,000... you assist your client in negotiating a price of $575,000. Your client places the deposit and signs the necessary paperwork. The sales agent then gives you the necessary paperwork for your brokerage to complete. You thank them for their assistance and accompany your client to the parking lot.

*the plot thickens*

After driving back to your office, you begin to go over the commission paperwork but you don't get far before you notice the following clause, "broker to be paid 3% of base price, not including any upgrades or Ryland design center purchases". You glance down to see the base price was $432,000 ($189,000 less than the contracted price). It wasn't until your very next heart beat (almost 90 seconds later) that you fully realize that Ryland was rewarding you for selling their most expensive model with almost $190,000 of upgrades, by taking over $4,000 in commission from you. Before you blow a fuse I'll remind you... this didn't happen to you. The bad news is all mine. Ryland wronged me. I'm currently surveying the battlefield at this point as to the best plan of attack. I was promised 3% (no disclaimers), and in sales profession, commission promised is paid on the sales price of the items sold. I'll keep you posted on how this turns out later.

*I know you're thinking this can't get any worse right?*

I then take my client's daughter to the builder as she is considering a purchase in the same complex to be close to mum. Daughter has a home to sell. The sales rep proceeds to tell my client (with me standing by her side), "we won't take your contingent offer unless you list and sell your home with a company we determine". Mom says, "Cameron is going to list their home". The sales rep proceeds to explain how the deal won't happen at all if the home isn't listed with the company of their choice. I'm now at a loss for words... well... words with more or less than 4 letters.

*to recap*

Ryland is attempting to reward me for selling a very expensive, highly upgraded home by shorting my commission $4,200.
-and-
Ryland has shown their appreciation for bringing in a client to purchase a home with them, by taking a listing from me (approximate commission loss on this one of $14,800).

Thank you Ryland. Thanks for the lesson. I'll pass it on to my family, friends, associates, and anyone else who cares to know about your questionable practices.


UPDATE 9-30-07: Ryland did end up paying what they initially promised, but they did it kicking and screaming. They tried to use the excuse... "this is what's standard"... my argument was... "I don't care what's standard, you promised me something else". I don't feel that they fully appreciate the role real estate agents play in their company's success (especially in a down market).